Collage pictures of Late Dr. Ikenna Erinne
A few days ago, I wrote an article about Tuface and Annie Idibia’s separation, using it as a lens to explore the silent struggles of men in relationships. I had no idea how much it would resonate. People tagged me, messaged me privately, and shared stories of men suffering in silence—men who feel unheard, misunderstood, and emotionally abandoned.
Then, I was tagged on the heartbreaking story of Dr. Ikenna Erinne, a Nigerian-American cardiologist who recently took his own life. The details are still emerging, but what we do know is that he had been locked in a painful custody and financial battle with his estranged wife. The weight of it all became too much, and now he’s gone. A promising life—wasted. A brilliant mind—lost. A father—erased from his children’s lives forever.
Dr. Ikenna is not the only one. He is just the latest in a growing list of men whose silent struggles end in tragedy. And this isn’t just a theoretical conversation for me. I write this from the ashes of my own pain and trauma. I know what it feels like to be isolated, to be unheard, to have your struggles dismissed simply because you are a man. I know what it feels like to fight for fairness in a system that often assumes men are the aggressors, never the victims.
The question now is: what can men do about this? And what can the women in their lives—mothers, sisters, daughters, friends—do to help protect the sanity of the men they love?
Men, Speak Up—Your Pain Matters
Men have been conditioned to believe that silence is strength. That suffering without complaint is a badge of honor. That breaking down is weakness. But what good is strength if it isolates you? What good is endurance if it leads to self-destruction?
We must create safe spaces for men to speak, without fear of judgment or ridicule. Therapy, support groups, even trusted friendships—these aren’t luxuries, they’re necessities. And if professional help isn’t accessible, we need to build a culture where men checking in on each other is normal, not an exception.
Women, You Have a Role to Play
To the reasonable women out there—mothers, wives, sisters, and friends—you have the power to be allies in this fight. Ask yourself: Are you a safe space for the men in your life? Do you listen without dismissing their struggles? Do you offer empathy instead of shaming them for feeling weak?
Not every woman is the enemy, just as not every man is a victim. But we cannot deny that some women have used societal narratives to their advantage, manipulating systems to punish men unfairly. This is not a call to excuse bad behavior, but a plea for fairness, for balance, and for justice that does not leave men broken beyond repair.
It’s Time for a New Conversation
Dr. Ikenna’s death should not just be another headline. It should be a wake-up call. We cannot keep losing men to silent battles.
For me, this isn’t just another topic—it’s deeply personal. I have been there. I have lived it. And I know that if we don’t start having honest conversations, if we don’t start supporting men in the same way society has learned to support women, more lives will be lost.
To my fellow men: Your pain is real. Your voice matters. You do not have to suffer in silence.
To the women who care: Protect the sanity of the men around you. Let fairness, not vengeance, guide your actions.
Dr. Ikenna is gone. But if we don’t act, he won’t be the last.